". . .because I said so!" Who hasn't heard that phrase?
As parents, we may have very good reasons for expecting children to follow our lead, yet rarely do we succeed in getting them to do just what we want. Have we failed as parents when our children question our authority? No! Agency is just as precious to them, as it is to us. Where we may have fallen short of the mark isn't in wanting our children to do what was right or expedient, it was in trying to use force to get what we want done, in the way we want it done or in the time we want it done. Conflict arises when we expect our children to be blind followers.
"Free agency, given us through the plan of our Father, is the alternative to Satan's plan of force. With this sublime gift, we can grow, improve, progress, and seek perfection. Without agency, none of us could grow and develop by leaning from our mistakes and errors and the mistakes and errors of others.
"Because of his rebellion, Lucifer was cast out and became Satan, the devil, "the father of all lies, to deceive and to blind men, and to lead them captive at his will, even as many as would not hearken unto [his] voice.' (Moses 4:4). . . .
"Let us not become so intense in our zeal to do good by winning arguments or by our pure intention in disputing doctrine that we go beyond good sense and manners, thereby promoting contention, or say or do imprudent things, invoke cynicism, or ridicule with flippancy. In this manner, our good motives become so misdirected that we lose friends and, even more serious, we come under the influence of the devil. I recently heard this truth: 'Your criticism may be worse than the conduct you are trying to correct.' " James E. Faust, Reaching Up for the Light ( Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1990), 105-6.
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